#38 - Becoming a Good Listener: Developing the Skill that Mattersđ
As kids, weâre told to listen and to pay attention, but are we told how to? As we grow older, we begin to realize that simply listening isnât enough, especially in our work and personal lives.
Welcome to the 38th issue of 5 Minute Friday from The Backpack CPA! Every Friday I share a short newsletter with tips & resources to help you with your professional & personal growth & development!
Let's start "GROWING" through our human journey instead of just "GOING" through it!
First a few words from a wise personâŠ
âMost people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.â ~Stephen R. Covey
Becoming a Good Listener: Developing the Skill that Mattersđ
As kids, weâre told to listen and to pay attention, but are we told how to? As we grow older, we begin to realize that simply listening isnât enough, especially in our work and personal lives. Being a good listener is a crucial soft skill that can help you succeed in your career, build relationships, and establish a trustworthy reputation. Fortunately, itâs a skill that can be developed and practiced. Here are some tips on how to become a good listener and improve your communication abilities.
1. Remove Distractions
The first step to becoming a good listener is to remove any potential distractions. Put away your phone, turn off the TV, close your computer, or find a quiet place to talk. By doing this, you can give your full attention to the person speaking to you. Not only will you be able to listen better, but youâll show the other person that you value their time and their opinion.
2. Practice Active Listening
Active listening requires more than just hearing what someone else is saying. It means giving your full attention, acknowledging their words, and responding in a way that shows you understand. To do this, use non-verbal cues such as nodding your head or making eye contact. Reflect back on what you heard and ask questions to clarify your understanding. Listening actively can help you gain a deeper understanding of the subject matter and establish a bond between you and the person with whom youâre communicating.
3. Avoid Interrupting
Interrupting someone while theyâre speaking is a surefire way to discredit the importance of what they're saying. Interrupting shows that youâre not fully invested in the conversation and that your needs or opinions are more important than theirs. To avoid interrupting, bite your tongue if you have to. Wait until the other person is done expressing their thoughts before you respond with your own.
4. Empathize with The Speaker
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. As a good listener, itâs essential to empathize with the speaker. Try to put yourself in their shoes and imagine how they feel. Show empathy by acknowledging their emotions, and reflecting on why they may be feeling a certain way. Doing so can help you connect on a deeper level and prioritize the other personâs needs over yours.
5. Avoid Jumping to Conclusions
Jumping to conclusions can be harmful in any conversation and can lead to misunderstandings. Itâs important to listen to the speaker's viewpoint entirely before forming an opinion that may or may not be accurate. Avoid assumptions or drawing conclusions about something you donât fully understand. If in doubt, ask for more context and clarity.
In conclusion, becoming a good listener is essential in any situation. It can help strengthen your relationships, improve your communication abilities, and enhance your overall career trajectory. By taking the time to remove distractions, practice active listening, avoid interrupting, empathize with the speaker, and avoid jumping to conclusions, you can become a good listener. And by developing this skill, youâll be able to succeed and create meaningful connections in both your professional and personal life. Listening may be one of the most important things you do.
đđĄ Learning/Tools
The Ladder of Inference đȘ
The Ladder of Inference is a tool developed by Chris Argyris and Peter Senge that helps people understand how they interpret and make sense of information.
In today's world, we are bombarded with an overwhelming amount of information every day. We make countless decisions- some big, some small- based on this information. However, have you ever stopped to consider why you make certain decisions or why you interpret things a certain way? Enter the Ladder of Inference. So, if you're looking to refine your decision-making skills and improve your thought process, keep reading!
At its core, the Ladder of Inference is about how we make sense of the world around us. It starts with observations: raw data, things we see happening around us. From these observations, we immediately start interpreting the data. We have experiences and beliefs that shape how we understand what we observe. This interpretation then leads us to make assumptions, which are based on our conclusions. Next, we draw conclusions, leading us to adopt beliefs that influence the decision we make or the actions we take.
When using this tool, it is essential to start with a neutral observation and, from there, climb up the rungs of the ladder. What often happens is that rather than sticking to neutral observations, we jump from the bottom rung straight up to conclusions and beliefs, skipping the interpretation and assumption stages. This can lead to misunderstandings, biased decision-making, and unnecessary conflicts. Being aware of these steps helps us avoid these situations and enables us to better consider the data objectively, challenge our assumptions, and make informed decisions.
Argyris and Senge believe that by understanding and using the Ladder of Inference, we can learn to make better decisions and improve our communication skills. Communication is key in any professional setting, and by climbing the rungs of the ladder, we are better equipped to articulate our thought processes. This tool can enhance our ability to explain our conclusions clearly and help others understand our perspective.
Practicing the Ladder of Inference helps us develop self-awareness and reflection skills. It encourages us to acknowledge our biases and assumptions, which is paramount to making better decisions. By questioning our own thoughts, assumptions, and beliefs, we open ourselves up to a wider range of options and opinions. Incorporating this tool into our daily routines helps us become more efficient problem-solvers and more empathetic colleagues.
There are many tools available to help us make better decisions, but the Ladder of Inference is a unique concept that is essential in helping us interpret information effectively. We should constantly aim to become better communicators and self-reflective decision-makers. Employing this tool may ultimately allow us to climb up the rungs of the ladder more accurately and effectively, leading to a bolder thought process and clearer lines of communication
If you want to chat about anything feel free to send me a message or even book a time to chat https://calendly.com/vbcpa/thebackpackcpa
Stay inspired & keep growing đ,
Vimal (or Vic)
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